It’s a strange feeling
It takes you by surprise
It feels like a you are trying to walk against the current
Like you are holding up a wall that really wants to fall down on you
Mourning
Mourning what was and what now is
Accepting
Accepting today without remembering yesterday
Try it, I can’t do it
Sadness
For myself, for others
Why is it such a solitary path?
Resistance
Resistance to what is
The what is – is a feeling of powerlessness
Having no control over what is happening right now
Wishing
Wishing I had hope
Wishing I had clarity
Wishing I had peace
Wishing I knew what this would look like a year from now
Hoping that peace of mind will come
Trusting that where I am is right where I’m supposed to be
Hating
Hating it all anyway
Hating the not knowing
Hating the way things are
Hating the unfairness of life
Permission
Permission to grieve
Permission to feel my loss
Permission to be angry and disappointed
Permission to cry
Crying
Crying with myself
Crying for all the frustration and confusion
Crying because I’m exhausted
Crying because I’m confused and lonely
Exhausted
Exhausted from all the crying
Exhausted from all the worrying
Exhausted from it all
Grief
It’s a strange feeling
It takes you by surprise
It feels like a you are trying to walk against the current
Like you are holding up a wall that really wants to fall down on you
But once you let go
You do actually feel better– Funny how Grief works