Grief

It’s a strange feeling

It takes you by surprise

It feels like a you are trying to walk against the current

Like you are holding up a wall that really wants to fall down on you

Mourning

Mourning what was and what now is

Accepting

Accepting today without remembering yesterday

Try it, I can’t do it

Sadness

For myself, for others

Why is it such a solitary path?

Resistance

Resistance to what is

The what is – is a feeling of powerlessness

Having no control over what is happening right now

Wishing

Wishing I had hope

Wishing I had clarity

Wishing I had peace

Wishing I knew what this would look like a year from now

Hoping that peace of mind will come

Trusting that where I am is right where I’m supposed to be

Hating

Hating it all anyway

Hating the not knowing

Hating the way things are

Hating the unfairness of life

Permission

Permission to grieve

Permission to feel my loss

Permission to be angry and disappointed

Permission to cry

Crying

Crying with myself

Crying for all the frustration and confusion

Crying because I’m exhausted

Crying because I’m confused and lonely

Exhausted

Exhausted from all the crying

Exhausted from all the worrying

Exhausted from it all

Grief

It’s a strange feeling

It takes you by surprise

It feels like a you are trying to walk against the current

Like you are holding up a wall that really wants to fall down on you

But once you let go

You do actually feel better– Funny how Grief works